How I Quit Sucking My Thumb

My mother says it’s childish and
my father says it’s dumb—
whenever they discover that
I’m sucking on my thumb.

It’s such a silly thing to do,
as everybody knows.
So now instead of sucking it
I stick it in my nose.

Copyright Credit: “How I Quit Sucking My Thumb” © 1991 Bruce Lansky. Reprinted from Kids Pick the Funniest Poems (© 1991 by Meadowbrook Creations) with permission from Meadowbrook Press.
Source: Kids Pick the Funniest Poems (Meadowbrook Press, 1991)